This weekend, we celebrated my sister’s 60th birthday. She threw the most amazing party on the rooftop of a fabulous hotel. Temperatures were taken and anti-COVID masks were required. The party began with a live saxophone player and a full-host bar, followed by a delicious meal, a piano player who sang, a well-known comedian, and a DJ who played dance music for the “grown and sexy.” It was no surprise that everyone who attended enjoyed themselves tremendously. It was the first time physically socializing for many in over a year due to the pandemic. There were lots of fist bumps, elbow touches, and yes, even hugs. It was clear that many of us were feeding our “Touch Starvation.” Yes, touch starvation is a real thing. I didn’t make it up. It’s possible you have it and don’t even know it.
Here’s a bit of information about this phenomenon and what to do about it.
What is it?
Touch starvation, also known as “skin hunger” or “touch deprivation” occurs when a person experiences little to no touch from other living beings. From birth until death, we humans are wired for physical contact. You are probably aware of how vital it is for infants to be touched regularly. Physical touch has a huge impact on their development. In fact, the need and desire for physical touch continues until death do us part. Since the COVID 19 pandemic shut-down, in March 2020, many of us have been missing those regular hugs, handshakes, massages, and sensual touching.
Why is it important?
Skin-to-skin contact is an important contributor to our mental, emotional, and physical health. Touch can reduce stress, heart rate, and blood pressure by stimulating pressure receptors that send signals to the vagus nerve. This nerve connects the brain to the rest of the body and can be a key factor in fighting stress. In addition, touch helps increase our levels of dopamine, the “happiness hormone,” and oxytocin, the “love hormone.” You don’t want to be without them.
What to do?
As we age, the idea is to hold onto the things we can, as long as we can. Touch brings great value to our lives as long as we can do it safely in our current social climate. Here are some ways to reverse touch deprivation:
Enjoy a massage, whether it’s by a professional or a loved one, it can work wonders.
Have a mani-pedi. Let someone pamper your hands and feet.
Sit close to your loved ones while you enjoy the latest Netflix film.
If it’s a love connection, hold hands, cuddle. I’ll leave the rest to your imagination and creativity.
Spend some time with a pet, yours or someone else’s. It may be time for a little pet therapy.
If you are not yet comfortable expanding your social boundaries, take the time you need to feel good about engaging with others. You can start off virtually. Here are a few suggestions to help satisfy your touch hunger:
Connect virtually with others. There are so many ways to do that now, video chats, FaceTime, and online classes are a few.
Wave to your neighbors or people you pass while taking your walks.
Host an online dinner and share a meal with friends virtually.
Talk with your friends and neighbors outside as you maintain social distance.
It’s your turn
I have a feeling that I’m not the only one from yesterday’s festivities that is still beaming from being able to share in such joy. I didn’t even know I had touch starvation until I treated it with laughter, dance, and connection with my loved ones. I am wishing the same for you.
If you have any suggestions or experiences that you would like to share, please post them in the comment section below.
Love & Light,